Start by reading Proverbs 6:16–19. KJV first, then NASB.
Tonight’s message title:
7 Sure Fire Ways to Ruin Your Marriage!
– or – (if you want to keep it positive)
7 Things To Avoid To Keep Your Marriage On Track!
Proverbs 6:16–19 is basically a catalog of sins summed up, that God hates the most, or sins that cause the most unrest.
Now, read further! Start back at verse 12!
While these aren’t the only sins that should be avoided, they do sum up most of the wicked things condemned by God in the old covenant. The seven things God hates are the sins that deal with the deep heart motives of individual people. These verses point the finger straight at our hearts and our sinful thought processes.
AND, all this is in line with what Jesus said about the Ten Commandments during His Sermon on the Mount, over in Matthew 5:21–48. Sin is committed the moment it is conceived in the heart, even before it is actually committed. Avoiding the seven things God hates will help us expose our hidden intentions and motives.
Arrogant (haughty) eyes:
This describes a feeling of pride and looking down upon others.
(Philippians 2:3, 5–11). When we begin to think of ourselves more highly and with unparalleled importance, we are forgetting the fact that anything good in us is the result of Christ living in us and that the old self is now dead (Galatians 2:20).
Marriage Application: What you see and where you look are very important to God. Fix your eyes on Jesus! Look at Jesus, and look at your spouse!
Lying tongue:
A lying tongue is one that speaks falsehood, knowingly and willingly, with an intention to deceive others. Lying can be used to impugn the character of a brother or to flatter a friend. It is a most detestable evil to God, who is a God of truth. Nothing we do causes us to more closely resemble the devil, who is the father of lies (John 8:44).
Marriage Application: Your tongue and the words it can produce will steer the course of your marriage. Like the rudder of a mighty ship. Use your tongue to Glorify God and to say good things about your marriage and you spouse!
Hands that shed innocent blood:
Now, this is referring to cold-blooded murder. We may never have orchestrated killing someone, but in Matthew 5:21–24, Jesus says that anyone even hating someone else unreasonably without offering room for forgiveness commits a sin equivalent to murder. John reiterates this concept in 1 John 3:15.
Marriage Application: In marriage, it’s not just about actual murder, but even about the anger or angst you have in your heart. Keep your heart right. You can use your hands to do wrong or to do right, the choice is yours.
A heart that devises wicked schemes:
This encompasses thinking or conceiving evil against any individual or group for personal benefit or other misguided objectives. Any sin is basically a wicked scheme. David’s sin against Uriah the Hittite and Bathsheba comes to mind (2 Samuel 11). The heart of an evil man continually contrives schemes to bring others to ruin, whether physically or spiritually.
Marriage Application: You may not have planned a terrorist plot against your spouse, but you may have schemed ways to get your own way, to work behind their back to get what you want; to manipulate a situation. Do all you can do to work things out in favor of your spouse!
Feet that are quick to rush into evil:
Those whose feet are quick to rush into evil display no resistance whatsoever to sin. Having many examples in the Bible, and having the indwelling of the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 4:30; Galatians 5:16), we are expected to be wise in this regard (Romans 6:11–14; Ephesians 5:5, 11). In the Garden of Eden, Eve had the first experience of temptation. She displayed no resistance to the serpent’s temptation. Instead, as soon as the devil attracted her to the fruit, she “saw that the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye” (Genesis 3:6). Eve had sinned at that moment itself. Contrast this with the attitude of Jesus: when tired and hungry after forty days and forty nights of fasting, He refused to yield to the devil’s tempting and killed the temptation in His mind without allowing it to grow into sin (Matthew 4:1–11). “Resist the devil and he will flee from you” (James 4:7).
Marriage Application: Do you really, seriously avoid evil, or do you entertain it? Always run to God, and not from God! Always be quick to run back to your spouse.
The opposite of this would be to shorten your reaction time to obedience with God.
False witness who pours out lies:
This is similar to the sin of the lying tongue, but Colossians 3:9–10 explains the reason for the continued prohibition against lying. Christians are new creations in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17), and, as such, we reflect His nature. We have been released from our “old self” with its evil practices such as lying and bearing false witness.
Marriage Application: Again, this points to doing or saying the wrong thing, even when the right thing is easier. Just tell the truth and be honest, not withdrawn or withholding. Always be honest with your spouse, display honesty!
A man who stirs up dissension among brothers:
Brothers are created by God to live in unity (Psalm 133:1; 1 Thessalonians 4:9). Believers are brothers and sisters since they have one Father God and one Brother, Jesus Christ. The Church is also the Bride of Christ (Ephesians 5:25–27). In many situations strife among brothers and even within the church seems unavoidable, but anyone who purposely causes disruption to peace in the body of Christ will displease God above all, since that person gives room for others to sin and for himself to sin further (1 John 2:9–11; 4:19–21). Moreover, Jesus pronounced a great blessing on peacemakers, the privilege to be called “sons of God” (Matthew 5:9).
Marriage Application: Don’t buy into the lies and pressures from outside your marriage that would cause problems inside your marriage. Resist outside forces against your marriage. Fight for your marriage against this crazed, anti-God, sin loving society. Stand for what is right, no matter what! Challenge: Lay it all on the line. Your marriage and your home were designed by God to represent Him on this earth. You are the example! We must choose to live opposite of this worlds system.